Blinded Me With Science

It has indeed been museum month on the blog. To bring August to a close, there is more. This time it concerns the projected science and technology museum that is due to rise from if not  the ashes then the ashen soil of what was the old power station by the port in Alcúdia. This is the science and technology museum about which there was all manner of hullabaloo some two years ago: went out to tender, the likes of Lord Rogers pitched for the gig as architect, a firm in Barcelona got it, the museum was going to be a great advance for tourism in the north, all the usual spin. When the actual project was presented and heralded as a “great icon in the north of the island” (reported on 23 October 2008, (Car) Parklife), it was observed that the funding was not actually in place. By coincidence, on 23 October I pointed out that 23 million euros were needed. They still are. And these still missing millions are but part of the problem. Various interested parties, not least Gesa, which still owns the installations, and the ports authority, have raised objections to aspects of the project. They have arisen only some ten months after the project was presented; only ten months. It may have taken this time but perhaps they needed it in order to realise that there are aspects of the project that no-one had recognised, such as what to do with deposits of gas that Gesa, quite rightly, would not like to be seen “given off”. There is also the not small matter of an electrical substation on the site which would need to be re-sited. 

 

The good news is that all parties are wanting to work to find an agreement and solution. The less good news is quite why some of this was not taken into account in the first place. Putting the project back on the drawing-board will probably mean more money for the architects to re-draw it and of course more time; more money for the architects from what pot exactly? There is no obvious time frame for the project to start or indeed to finish; you wouldn’t expect there to be so given that there is no money for it, which there isn’t. The bigger question, therefore, surrounds whether it will ever start, owing to that funding requirement. While the museum may indeed become “iconic”, assuming there is ever something physical that could be seen as an icon, quite what would make it so is also not clear. And one returns, inevitably, to the key question. What is the point of it? It may indeed yet be something rather grand and splendid that will attract extra tourists, but the key surely lies in that word “extra”.

 

Major tourist attractions on Mallorca are mostly to be found in the south. It is to the south that many excursions, from the north, go. Would there be excursions in reverse, i.e. from south to north? It is this sort of question that needs to be asked of the project, and an answer offered, and one can only begin to arrive at such an answer if one knows exactly what is intended. Museums are all well and good, but it would have to be something special to shake tourists from their southern sloth (and from that in other parts of the island as well as locally) to make the Alcúdia project truly worthwhile and truly iconic. Perhaps it will be. But the portents are not necessarily favourable, and nor is the fact that some fairly basic oversights appear to have been made. 

 

When this project was first announced in May 2007 (23 May in fact; always 23), I made the rather obviously flippant reference to the Millennium Dome, given Lord Rogers’ appearance on the list of those up for it. But the experience of that building may not be wholly without parallel. One feels that the “iconic” aspect of this new museum would lie in its appearance, i.e. its architectural magnificence – maybe. One would feel rather more comfortable if the project was more bottom-up, as in what it will be and what it will include. The building itself seems to take precedence. That is not unimportant. Most certainly it is not, nor would be its visual harmony on the bay of Alcúdia nor its potentially emblematic statement. But as important, if not more so, is what they would actually do with it.

 

Note: references to dates in 2007 and 2008 are not archived on this version of the blog but on the original – http://www.alcudiapollensa.blogspot.com

The Way We Were

And yet more museum news. Museums have suddenly become the flavour of the month. Maybe it’s the silly season. And it all rather depends upon your view of museums as to whether you believe the 1.5 million euros that the culture ministry is setting aside to upgrade the ethnology museum in Muro is silly or sensible. I’ll go with the latter, if that’s alright by you. The only problem is knowing who actually ever goes to the museum. Tourists? Hmm, not in great numbers one would imagine.

 

What is the ethnology museum? It is, as the director says in “The Diario”, a museum devoted to pre-tourist Mallorca, one that shows the life of people of the island in their domestic and working environments. Essentially, it is a memorial to a rural way of life that may not have totally died out but which has been forgotten by many Mallorcans and foreigners alike. The director says that, after the museum opened in 1964, everyone would have known what a plough was, for instance. But not now. The displays at the museum are to include rooms that show how things were for the pre-tourist Mallorcan. It is a splendid and laudable project, to be supported with audio-visual that one hopes will be correctly multi-lingual. Museums that deal with real lives are more vital, literally, than those which merely display pieces of ancient artefact with a sterility and lack of engagement of the visitor. They should consider special shows with music, dance and activities representative of different epochs before tourism.

 

This celebration of life as it once was has become a feature of local fiestas. Both Pollensa (during Patrona) and Binissalem have staged reconstructions or musical events indicative of a bygone era. It may not be every tourist’s cup of tea, but it is a favoured brew for many who have formed an intimate attachment with the island and for whom the history, the real history, goes beyond the fleshpotism of sun and beach. Critical I may have been of attempts at developing an alternative tourism, but not of this, so long as it is done well and so long as people go. And that’s the real problem. 

 

Muro town has been the beneficiary of separate upgrade financing – two million euros worth of it (as reported on 10 June: Money For Nothing?). The tourism minister presided over the celebration of the completion of the redevelopment project, stating that it was an example of creating tourism de-seasonalisation in this interior town. But who ever goes to Muro? I’ve said it before, but it bears repetition: there is no bus route between the town and Playa de Muro. Thousands of tourists not exactly on the town’s doorstep but on what would be a fifteen minute bus ride. The tourism office in Playa de Muro has material about the town, but how do you get to it? 

Surf’s Up

Things you can’t take to the beach – or shouldn’t, must not: pets (goldfish presumably not, but mainly dogs); camping gear, cooking devices; boats, kites for surfing, jet-skis, oil tankers, nuclear submarines – oh, and windsurf boards and sails. Or to clarify. Dogs are not irregular visitors to the beach, but no-one seems to much do anything about them; jet-skis, kitesurfs can be taken so long as they are in the “sports zones” or beaches set aside, such as – for kitesurfing – La Marina in Alcúdia and Es Comú in Playa de Muro. And also windsurfs. 

 

On the beach in Playa de Muro three windsurfers were making their way back to shore. A lifeguard was on patrol. The whistle went and there ensued much gesticulation, discussion and talking into his two-way by the lifeguard. Plod arrived. Plod on water. Plod on a jet-ski, carefully brought into shore without the engine in full blast. More discussion. 

 

Windsurfing, unlike jet-skis and kitesurfing is not particularly dangerous in terms of potential harm to other sea users. So long as there are not many of them and the windsurfer knows what he or she is doing. As soon as there are a load of them and those who don’t know what they’re doing, then there is the potential for harm. Hence, you cannot windsurf wherever takes your fancy. Them’s the rules. Except for those who believe that the rules are there for others. It is not a uniquely Spanish thing, but there is a definite trait that says rules are for others – this manifests itself in various ways, one of which is bringing the windsurf board, the jet-ski or the kite to the beaches where they shouldn’t be. Probably along with the dog as well. 

 

The kitesurfing that occurs at La Marina has become something of a sightseeing spot. When the wind is blowing, as it often does there, the skies are full of colour and of Charlie Browners performing mobes. It is a spectacle. But unfortunately it is also quite dangerous. Not because of the kitesurfing per se, but because of the rubber-neckers, the Charlie Browners (kitesurfers) themselves and those drivers who just suddenly stop. The road here is a blackspot, which is why there are always floral tributes. The kitesurfers wander and run across the road to their cars; tourists pull up with little warning or poodle along too slowly. There’s going to be an incident there.

 

 

Museum piece

More on museums. The Inca footwear museum controversy continues. The opposition Partido Popular at the town hall has denounced the extra costs of 800,000 euros for the museum. It says that it has been known for five years that extra funding would be needed and that the whole project has been a “botched job”. Meanwhile, the projected new Pollentia museum in Alcúdia is to be funded courtesy of money from the central government. The sub-director for state museums, and there is such an individual, has promised the consortium (the town hall and agencies of the Mallorca Council and regional government) that the money will be forthcoming under budgets for 2011. So, work is unlikely to start till then. The level of funding has not been disclosed but is believed to be in the region of three million euros.

 

And still on local project funding. Threequarters of a million euros have been forked out to create the park by La Gola in Puerto Pollensa. This has been a colossal waste of money. It should have been reserved only to keep the water clean and free of the stagnation it has been prone to; the rest, pointless. Doubly pointless as the park is not being maintained properly. It is full of dog shit and litter and benches have graffiti. One has the impression that officialdom has washed its hands of the whole thing; there hasn’t even been an official opening.

Walking In My Shoes

They’ve got the hump in Puerto Pollensa: several humps, sleeping policemen, zebra bumps. Along the coast road, raised crossings, Newcastle United stripes on mounds, traffic calmers. No more pedestrianisation, but instead more ways of slowing the cars. Things that go bump in the night and in the day. So many humps – concrete, plastic, plastic falling to pieces, exposing bolts that rip open tyres, concrete humps that deflate, rock the suspension. At least the coast road humps are gentler, assuming they are not taken at high speed; they are smooth-curved, not the kerb variety of raised crossings in front of the parking in Puerto Alcúdia. These are car-friendly and pedestrian-friendly. No vehicle should travel at high velocity along that coast road, certainly not at this time of year. People emerge, emerge from the invisibility caused by parked cars, step out, cross when least expected. The crossings in Playa de Muro are a menace, the crossers shielded by hedge, palm or car. They should also be raised on a gentle slope.

 

 

Museums. I have been less than complimentary about them in the past. They are too often of the past with no sense of the contemporary in their style or their interactivity. There is meant to be a new museum in Inca. One devoted to footwear. Well there is a new museum – nearly. It has been projected for years, but it may be a while yet. The town hall doesn’t have the money to open and maintain it; the building itself is not that far from completion. The town hall wants the tourism ministry to cough up. Its argument is that the museum is not just one for Inca but for the whole island. It also says, however, that help from the museum would be a part of the development of a strategic plan for tourism in Inca. The two points don’t quite match up, but be that as it may. A question is how much of an impact a museum of footwear would have for tourism. It may be an important aspect of the Inca and Mallorcan economies – and there are few companies more important than Camper in terms of international business – but would it really have tourists coming in great numbers? Probably depends what goes in it. The mayor of Inca wants a museum “that works” and not just a “grand exhibition” (as quoted in translation from “The Diario”). Quite what that means I’m not sure. One might have hoped that they would have sorted that out by now as the opening is meant to be in November. Not without that money from the ministry it won’t be. 

Art For Art’s Sake

Jeremy Paxman believes that the British spend too much time watching television and that television they watch in great droves, like “Britain’s Got Talent”, represents time that would be better spent going to the likes of art galleries. There was a discussion of this on Stephen Nolan’s Five Live show, with Rod Liddle basically agreeing with Paxman, while readily admitting he was being elitist.

This is not a discussion for this blog, but it acts as a neat point of entry to Alcúdia town hall’s current list of events – painting exhibition, pottery exhibition and a theatrical production in Catalan. These should have tourists turning up in their droves. Ah but, you say, these are just for local people. In the main yes, but not exclusively. Either way, they still fall firmly into the category – worthy but dull. Well can one imagine the excitement generated around the pools of Bellevue at the news that a German artist has got a few pictures hanging in the library in the old town. Don’t all rush at once.

It was pleasing to hear views on the Nolan programme that museums and their like should be places of interactivity and of entertainment, a point I have made myself in respect of the planned new Pollentia museum. For the couch-potato, TV-watching, double-Susan Boyle-sized Philistine Brits, read the sun lounger-potato, double-Susan Boyle-sized Philistine Brit tourists, also TV watching, be it “Talent” or the Cup Final at the nearest bar, when they could be looking blankly at some ceramics or attending a play in an indecipherable language.

This is not to say that the town hall shouldn’t put on these events, but it is to say that if they seriously believe tourists are going to take much notice, then they should think again. Recently, it was announced that the summer Via Fora programme (the dramatised street productions) would be held inside the walls of the old town and not just outside them – as has been the case. Boy, that’s a major innovation. Sadly, much as the Via Fora historical representations are quite good, they also fail to inspire the tourist to vacate his bar stool. Why not do one in English and stage it in the Bellevue show garden? The history of Alcúdia with loads of flashing lights, blokes with swords, hologram religious icons weeping; that sort of malarkey. A sort of Pirates with only the odd pirate and loads of Romans and Moors. Far too unauthentic probably, and Heaven forbid it shouldn’t be in Catalan, but you know something, I reckon they’d be packed out. Actually, forget it, Alcúdia town hall. Don’t bother reading this. I’m on the phone to a theatrical impresario. Or maybe Paxman’s got a few bob knocking around he’d care to invest.